Ven. Ajahn Brahm
Am I Good Enough? — a lesson on unconditional love
On Sunday, April 14, 2024, after meditation, we listened to a Dharma talk by Ven. Ajahn Brahm on the topic of “Am I Good Enough?

Often, no matter how much we achieve, or how much we try to please others, we still feel that we are not good enough. Ajahn Brahm teaches us to not worry so much about what others think, or what the “cultural norm” says we must achieve. He said we should learn to not judge ourselves, and to be kind to ourselves, love and respect ourselves. But how do we do that? We develop unconditional love for ourselves by cultivating unconditional love for others. And we learn to not judge ourselves by not judging others. The way we treat others is often the way we treat ourselves, he said.

He quoted this Dalai Lama teaching: “if you are having a difficult time with your boss at work, remember you only have to stay with the boss 40 hours a week, but they have to stay with themselves 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, for the rest of their life. So have some pity for them – they have 24/7 suffering whereas you only have 40 hours of suffering a week.” So, if you think you are hopeless, learn how to be kind to others – you can stroke a pet, for example! And learn to love yourself as you love others – no more, no less. Open the door of your heart to yourself, no matter what you have done – accepting yourself just as you are. And the amazing thing is, Ajahn Brahm taught – when you feel you are good enough, you develop self-esteem, and you actually become good enough. That’s when you start to grow and get better and better. However, if you don’t think you are good enough – if you think you inherently lack something, that you need to improve, then you actually get worse. When you feel you are good enough – that’s when you actually improve!

In the few minutes left after listening to the talk, the group briefly shared what resonated with them in the talk and how spiraling moments of low self-esteem could be. We encourage everyone to try the daily self-love practice that Ajahn Brahm’s teacher taught him – smile at yourself in the mirror every morning!

Scroll down to listen to Ajahn Brahm’s talk.

Happy Learning!


From the Teachers: Am I Good Enough? — a lesson on unconditional love

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Am I Good Enough?” by Ven. Ajahn Brahm*


* Ven. Ajahn Brahmavaṃso, or simply Ajahn Brahm, is a renowned British-Australian Theravada Buddhist monk. Before becoming a monk, he studied Theoretical Physics at Emmanuel College, University of Cambridge in the late 1960s and taught in a high school for one year before traveling to Thailand to become a monk. He was ordained in Bangkok at the age of 23, and subsequently spent 9 years studying and training in the forest meditation tradition under Ajahn Chah. Currently Ajahn Brahm is the Abbot of Bodhinyana Monastery, in Serpentine, Western Australia. He is invited to give numerous lectures globally each year, and is an author of several books including Don’t Worry, Be Grumpy, and Who Ordered This Truckload of Dung?